Good morning. Well, technically its morning already .[12:10am] So its considered. I haven't posted for awhile, too busy with CCA , finally its over for the month. Can't stand the ppl there.all fucked up. Well, im used to a freaked up world . everywhere I go, each year I advanced into a more mature category , there is bound to be people who think they have something against you or they are just plain idiotic. Im not one to say , I've been suffering in Primary school during my last supposedly "MEMORABLE" years as a senior . I've suffered from bullying, I went to my school counselor , but nothing helped.Finally, my story ended there and then on graduation day. I was happy , yet sad. For one, I'll finally be leaving all of my burdens behind and move on with my life. But for another, I'll never be able to forget that warm feeling of trust that I'd have to leave behind for good. I could no longer get it back, neither can I keep it. Because You broke it . But thinking about it,I have learnt a lot from those times . And suffered extreme measures before finally getting the cruel game of fate that life was playing on me . There was no real answer in the world. It is neither wrong nor right, depends on the way people see it .But the problem with me back then was that , I didn't accept my situation as it is.If I dont accept my situation , then theres nothing i could do abt it. I had to accept that there are bastards in my life who don't want to be understood. and that I can't change my situation just because I wanted it to happen.I had to accept everything, the changes I had to make, and the changes I couldnt make. and from there be able to change everything and finally defeat the enemy .But even before I could change anything, someone came into my life and destroyed everything . I trusted him. He betrayed my trust, and I could never forgive him. It was either me or him who was at fault. Even if the fault was mine, I dont want to be forgiven , not by someone like Him.It was because of his presence that inflicted pain and and humiliation into my life that made it impossible for me to learn to walk on my own again.He just walks in and out of ppl's lives as he wishes, leaving behind scars.He doesn't care to explain himself. Unreasonably enjoying himself as he does so . But why must You be like him? On that day , I'll never forget that look he gave me. Neither shall I forget the warmth, comfort, and security in your voice, and your presence. It was so surreal , yet an illusion. So warm, yet so hurtful. I knew it was him immediately, that familiar presence, that familiar warmth, it all boiled down to one thing --- I havent moved on. You have hurt me so much that I could still remember those days I stood waiting for your call. Longing for that deep sound of your voice to penetrate my ears that makes me so calm. But why ? That was all I was asking . But no one cared. che, more like no one understood. But it doesnt matter now. Cause I know I can handle it... for now. I walk my own path alone.Theres no one who understand, no one to rely on. Just me, and Only me. Then I entered sec 1 , I wanted a change ... and so it started....
And so my story begins where every story began, At an Ending .
8:05 AM
